"Unfortunat[e]ly, today's society has distinctly less respect for propriety, morality, and dignity. Modern odes include sarcastic poems about various subjects, including velcro and vegetables."

(Taken from [link])

An Ode to Olivia Benson

Long ago, the police academy test you did pass,
Probably because you were so good at kicking ass.
We've seen you deliver a deadly elbow to a man's nose,
And seduce a perp in pantyhose.
And before I go any further,
I'd like to mention the time you smooshed a cop's burger.
You were awesome in the prison undercover,
Not to mention you never took any crap from your mother.
And why is it that even in your mug shot,
You still look pretty damn hot?
Oh--speaking of which,
I just gotta say, Hooker Benson was the shiz.
When perps start giving you loads of poo,
Your immediate response is, "Screw you."
And I can't even begin to count how many bastards you've tackled,
Each time emitting an evil cackle. (bwahaha)
Your partnership with Stabler was tested by Victor Paul Gitano,
You really went medieval on his ass, though!
I laughed out loud when you kneed that guy in the balls,
And when you were dubbed "Queen of the Malls."
Arguments are settled by you pretty easily,
With a simple, "Girls, girls... You're both pretty."
You set the record straight with THE "Masterbaiter."
Every day you sure show those women haters.
And, long story short,
One of your best moments was administering that breathalizer in court.
With a simple, dead-pan, "You're kidding me..."
I'm sure you made Bitch-ADA want to flee.
But, just one quick question:
Why is it that with everyon you have sexual tension?
With Fin, Elliot, Munch, Casey, Warner, and Alex,
Good Lord, who next?
At least, nowadays, being a bisexual
Isn't really that unusual.
I just have one request before this ode reaches its end:
Olivia Benson, please be my friend.
And even though I know you have many,
I'd much rather you not be my enemy!

Ugh, I forgot how much I hated poetry. This was inspired by my watching part of the episode, "911," on YouTube. The part where the "deadly elbow" was delivered to the pedo's nose. Yeah, I watched it over and over and over and over again. Beautiful.